See that’s the problem. You never get used to being absent. It hurts and it hurts every single time that you are unable to participate because of PD. The loneliness that comes with PD is a special kind of hell. At times like this you realise that the world doesn’t stop moving because you can’t. It doesn’t make allowances for you. And sometimes accepting this is the only way forward. On some days, you just cannot see the sunshine.
But then tomorrow is a new day and you wake up in the morning with a positive attitude, hoping that the sun will shine brighter than ever. The day starts out sluggishly but then a conversation with my youngest son happens. We are walking back to the car after picking him up from school, just him and me walking along the footpath.
“Shall we look out for cats?” I ask him.
“Yes, we must!!” he says. “But it would be better if we get a cat at home”
“Oh yes, that would be lovely” I sigh.
“Yes, we should get a cat because when Dada, Pappa and I go out, you can be home with the cat and you’ll not feel alone anymore”.
That’s when I stop my sweet boy in his tracks, bend down and give him a cuddle. On some days, the sun shines on you as if it were a spotlight and today is one such day.
Notes On The Go 
Leave a comment